You will hardly find the husband planning the family's future by talking about investments and savings. You will hardly find the husband as the one who has the right answers to issues the children are facing. It is usually the mothers who end up being the voice of reason. What is the reason for this image? Well there are many answers to that question, but instead of tackling the question, I wanted to get you thinking about your own marriage. I am writing to you husbands.

What is the secret of having a successful marriage, where you are the opposite of images that you see on TV? Well the secret is in the way you treat your wife. The greatest success of my life is my marriage. Yes that is not going to gain me the same fame or honor that our culture ascribes to men of power and great wealth. But this is not about our culture; it is about me and my wife. As a husband in a successful marriage, I have a few things that I have learned along the way that are keys to a fulfilling existence. Beyond love, your wife needs to be able to trust, respect and honor you. The following keys are necessary to gain that trust, respect and honor from your wife.

1. Treat your wife as your equal. If both of you work, do not expect her to have dinner ready and the kids prepared for the next day, while you get to come home from your job to eat and watch television. Both of you have been working, so share the work. Learn to cook. Learn to get the children ready.

2. Have a plan for your family's success. Your wife does not need to be the one wondering where your family is heading. You are the head of your household. As the head of your household you should have a vision of where your family is going. You should be leading your family to that destination. If you are merely fumbling around in life, your wife will not feel confident in your ability to lead. She will be tempted to take control, because her objective is the wellbeing of her household. And she will do whatever it takes to make sure her household is taken care of, even if that means knocking you out of the way. So have a plan. Work on the plan. Talk to your wife about the plan and most importantly, act on the plan.

3. Do not cheat on your wife. This may sound like a no-brainer, but let me elaborate. This means no looking at any other female to arouse feelings that should only be reserved for your wife. In other words, do not have anything to do with pornography, do not engage in sexual jokes about other women, and do not discuss sex with external parties, especially those of the opposite sex. Do not let your eyes wander when you are in public with your wife or most importantly when you are alone. When you carry yourself this way, your wife will see you as a strong man whose single focus is on her. She knows how much temptation is out there and she knows how 'weak' men are. So she will recognize the strength in you when you are able to live a faithful life.

4. Invest your time in your children. Give your wife a break and spend time with the children. Do not expect her to be the one going to the parent-teacher meetings. Show some interest in your children's work by attending the meetings. Take your children to practice. Encourage your children to do better. Have talks with your sons and your daughters. Most importantly, when you treat your wife with respect you will gain your children's respect.

5. Finally, take the lead in spiritual matters. Often you will find the mothers taking the lead in spiritual matters. The reason? See number 2 above. Men, you have an awesome responsibility to raise your children to be successful psychologically, physiologically and spiritually. If you are ignorant of spiritual matters, pick up a book. Shut off the television and take some time to reflect on your existence. Why are you here? Where did you come from? Who are you? If you died tomorrow, what happens next?

I have lived by these keys for years and have gained the respect, honor, trust and undying love of my wife. We are more in love today than when we first married. She is truly my best friend and it is the same for her. I enjoy spending time with my wife and she does too. Ours is a marriage of heaven on earth. But it takes work and commitment.